Turn Back the Clock

by Hal O'Leary

Be it known, I do not jest,
I need to get this off my chest
A female would say 'off my breasts,
That is if she were like Mae West.
Who looked on them as her "hope chest"
That female will, of course invest
In plunging gowns and all the rest
In hopes that she can then attest
From bulging eyes, we've passed the test.
But be it known, I can suggest
That I'm a male with some unrest.
So, if you will, at my behest,
Please lend an ear while I divest
Myself of something I protest.

While females get to proudly show
The beauties that they have in tow,
With cleavage plunging oh so low
And by that show begin to sow
The seeds that cause a man to grow,
The male must never ever, 'NO'
Display the gems he has below
The one time cod-peice had to go.
No longer can a good man crow
But, it's not true with the fauna though
The stag has antlers, not the doe.
And so, it's well that you should know,
It's time for men to holler 'Whoa"
"Revive the cod-peice", and bestow
The odds men favored long ago.
What's good for Jane is good for Joe.

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Hal O'Leary is an eighty-five year old veteran of WWII. He is the retired founder and artistic director of Oglebay Instituite's Towngate Theatre in Wheeling, WV. He was most recently inducted into the Wheeling Hall of Fame and is the recipient of an Honorary of Doctor of Humane Letters degree from West Liberty University.